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July 22 So this new contraption in my bodyis a wild experience. If you dont have one, it is hard to explain - and I must do so endlessly it seems. I dont mind, I would be curious too, but it gets tiring because I am hardly an expert. I have the lap band, it works like an hour glass or a funnel, if food cant squeeze through the small opening it has made in my otherwise pretine and just as I was created stomach (nothing cut, stapled or otherwise altered - everything reversible and so on) then I will get sick. SO I must change my eating habits - eat smaller ammounts, slower, and healtier - nothing doughy that can clog the drain so to speak. (No rice, bread, potato, pasta, etc. which is a drag but sorta the point) AND every once in a while I need the Dr or RNP to access the port that has been sewn i under my skin on my belly to add saline to tghten the band and make the hole smaller. They call this "A Fill" like you are a car going in for an oil change or more gasoline.
ANyway I was TERRIFIED when I woke up today. I got fairly well dressed (that is a dead give away that I am feeling vulnerable by the way - If I am dressing up for a Dr appointment I am scared - it is like putting on armor before battle - I know I am a weirdo) but the actual accessing the port was NOTHING. I know I know I never believed anyone telling me that either. A needle in the belly has GOT to hurt like the DIckens but you know other than the anticipated stick it was NOTHING. Now she looked and noticed that my incision (you know the one I ASKED and drove up in rush hour for the Dr to look at a few weeks back? yeah that one) and said it was not healing right. I said, "Yes I know, but the Dr did not do anything on either appoint I set up" well she did, before I knew it she had a scalpel in her hand and she sliced me gently so it could drain. No pain killers needed, and it only hurt a little, it was WAY more scary than painful.
But I like my scale better than there's. According to thir scale I went from 257 (day of first visit in May) to 248 day of surgery to 234 today. Not nothing. But my scale is way more friendly. We have a naked morning ritual on weigh in days - naked and before coffee I have gone from 267 in APril when I was depressed and desperate to 228 today. I know no two scales are the same, and I weighed in there with clothes on and having already eatten, but still, 6 pounds difference (the wrong way) made me sad. HAD their scale said I weighed 6 pounds lighter than mine I would be doing the happy dance!!!
Either way I am headed in the right direction - yay me. First fill down - weren't no thang....in the words of my eloquent English professor at Cal State Northridge... July 16 I just found this site and think it is incredible - you can check it out yourself at www.safetytat.com but what I LOVE is that these are tattoos that you can write your cell phone number on - if you have a child with an allergy or a toddler you might become separated from, these are a GREAT idea! Choose your tattoo and go! AWESOME! What will they think of next? As a Mom I am always looking for stuff like this, though my kids know their home phone number now - if we are traveling I dont think they would remember my cell - Here is another tip though, when traveling, on your answering machine at home, do not say you are traveling but you CAN leave an alternate number like, "Hello, you've reached.... you may choose to also contact my cell at...." which does not say that you are not staying at your house, but if Disneyland is calling they have a chance to find you if your kids only know their home phone and are lost. Just a thought - anyway I thought I would share these - Enjoy and be safe... Julianne 
Step 1 - Choose Now Tats a Good Idea!
New ordering options from SafetyTat If you’d like the same design for all your Safety Tattoos, choose from the Single Design selections. If you’d like a little variety, check out our new “Tat Packs”, which include two popular designs per order. Color and contrast of SafetyTats will vary with skin tone. Click here to see a preview of an applied SafetyTat tattoo. Single Design SafetyTats: One Design per Order                 Tat Packs: Two Designs per Order     July 15 http://www.daratorres.com/gallery.php This is quite possibly the coolest picture I have ever seen. It is my HERO Dara Toprres with her 2 year old baby after dominating the 50 in Omaha to go to the Olympics at 41. I blogged about that day before and it is as impressive to me still - her official web page makes me smile - one of the topics she lists talks about middle aged mortals at the olympics - like she is a mere mortal - HA. Seriously I MUST get a poster for my walls like I was a teenager - she completely rocks! I cant wait to see her swim. I LOVE that only two of the kids on the team were even alive when she won her first gold medal - how awesome is that?
ANYWAY I have even better news - I GET TO SWIM AGAIN! Now, I am no Dara Torres, but I can cut a lane or two in my day. I am looking forward to swimming a bunch and by fall I hope to join the local Masters team so that by next Spring I can do some of the open water swims locally here. The water here is cold, but other than cold there is nothing to worry about. People here freak out about swimming in open water here, why? I dont get it, but then I have been blessed to swim with sharks in So. Cal, Tahiti, Mexico, and Hawaii (I wish I could say when I was in Australia I had the cahonies to get in the water BUT there was Great White Sharks out there and while I am a stud I am no death wish freak) so what do a few rabid Salmon have to freak me out about??? Ha ha ha. The water is a little more murky though....
STILL Dara Torres is my hero....check out her site and get on board cheering on the Mamma!
Dude - things are INSANE. I cant get to it all while still recovering from surgery. I would like to tak ethe Dr who told me I would be "Back to work in 3 days" and throttle him. What the? It is 4 weeks out now and I am still moving slower than usual. That is NOT ok with so many people on their way! I cannot believe my big brother his lovely wife and their darling baby will be here tomorrow! WHOO HOO! Words cannot describe how excited I am. I even went and got them stuff so that they will be comfy while they are here - you know little things, diapers so they dont have to worry, his favorite snack food, etc. I am SO excited. My Dad and little sister are coming on Thursday too! Jiminy Crickets we will have a FULL house! Likely to hit Mariners game this weekend and some sights plus the kids are in a little dance performance this Friday. Whew hold my breath and I might make it through - but before I can get to the sights and the fun I GOTTA CLEAN and that means I gotta stop needing to SIT down. My back hurts my tummy hurts and I am hungry so I am cranky - oh yeah I am a LOAD of fun! Come hang out with me - no really - you might make it outta here with your sanity, Lord knows I lost mine! Ha ha ha....
ANYWAY if you call and I am short with you, it is NOT you I am just under the gun!!! July 14 Dude - I heard this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vG9XfJxMY8A&feature=related on the radio today and started to cry. Maybe it is because my 20 year High School reunion is in the works this August. Yes that is right TWENTY YEARS! Whoa. Anyway, as I was driving to get the kids from Dance Camp I got to see a teeny tiny baby and for a second I wished we could have more. Well to be honest, I always wanted more. Harry, not so much. We had a deal - no putting ON the planet more than you take OFF the planet when you go, and we hit the jack pot a boy and a girl. We would adopt and still may, but as for making more, lets face it, I am pushing 40 soon (in a year and a half) and I do NOT want to be 60 with 20 somethings running around making HUGE mistakes. But for a second, I REALLY missed the baby days. Then I heard the song and it said what I was thinking - I missed everytghing. I missed my youth, I missed our old apartment in Marina del Rey, I missed our "BIG" move to Seattle, I missed the old "little" house, I missed the babies - but you know other than High school (well now that I think about it, I remember some day camp days I wish I had back too!) not ONE memory not one "I miss that" did not include Harry. That was nice. He is So my dude.
ANYWAY check out the sappy song. Be reflective a bit. Then go hug your babies - they will be teenagers before we know it! July 13 So you know the Dr really must know what he is doing. My "fill" (I swear every time I say that it sounds like I am a car going in for an oil change) is in a week and a half. That is when I get to have a BIG needle put in my "Port" (borg part) and have a few cc's of saline injected so that the band around my stomach gets tighter. At first, after surgery and after the liquid diet, I was not only very careful about what I ate and how much I ate because I was scared but also because I just had no appetite. I wonder if the Codiene helped with that - it certainly did not "take away" the pain just made me completely appathetic towards the pain (and everything else what a horrible feeling). ANYWAY now that I am mostly healing except for a few spots that are still not completely closed yet, I obviously am getting my appetite back - and in spades. My "head hunger" is a nasty mother you know what-er. I do not need these things but I find myself "wanting" things - things I di dnot even LIKE because I cannot have them. That is my deal - you want to make sure I will do something? Go ahead and tell me I cant. I will rise to that challenge it is like an achilles heal. I probably should not have disclosed that, but hey, if you know me at all it is hardly a secret. Somewhere my husband is laughing his ass off - stop that it is not nice to laugh so hard soda comes out your nose sweetie - :)
ANYWAY the head hunger made me want the following today (none of which I had, I just wanted till I moved on to wanting something else) A Big Mac, hot fudge sundae, milk shake, french fries, chili dog, pizza, pasta, potato, BREAD, more bread, did I mention bread (I really wanted some bread). OK what I had instead, my alloted oatmeal for breakfast, all my fluids, a chicken wrap for lunch, some gazpacho soup and hummous with veggies for dinner and for a snack one handful of peanuts, That is it. ALL within limits. Not a lot of glamour or fun, but hey that was sorta the point, right?
So head hunger is a bitch and I will name her Evangeline. I HATE that bitch. So when she shows up I am showing her ass the door, baby. So far I am down from 267 (start weight in April) to 228 (now). SO Evangeline, I am winning honey, and you know what? I like winning. My husband likes that I am starting to "care" about matching my unmentionables again and my clothes are not exactly tents anymore. I like that I do not touch the sides in the movie theatre seats and that pretty soon my double chin will be a thing of the past but you know what I like the best? If I do this right, sweetie pie, This weight that I am right now? Right here? This is the biggest I will ever be ever again. I will never weigh more than I do right now. I will win that at least - I may not make goal, I hope to and will try every day to get there - but at least I CAN achieve that. I never have to get any bigger. So take your soft talking suggestions of fatty death high caloric thrill ride cheap food and go bug someone else - I am not answering the door anymore! So we have had an insane weekend. There are weekends when you got nothin' planned, and then there are weekends like this one, where you have family coming in and you must clean the house, there are a million birthday parties and you are expected at all of them, your Mom has a guest coming to town who is a long lost AUnt (Hi Aunt Alice) and you need to go see her which sounds like a blast if there was not so much to do too AND you have a job interview at the Church after Mass this morning. Whew! Yesterday we had two parties back to back which was pretty hard on the kids. I was asked at both parties to do face painting and I gotta say it was fun, I made a little poster for the parties so that the kids could choose what they wanted if they got stuck not knowing and off we went. Even the adults were asking for Tattoos. It was fun. Even though I was an invited guest, I never got up from the chair because my line was never empty till I finally said it was time to stop - each party I painted for 3 hours straight - it was creative and fun but took more out of me than I anticipated. Even though my kids were guests at the party people assumed I was hired to be "Entertainment" which is funny to me. I had not painted faces for years and even then it was a fledging effort - but people liked my stuff so that was fun.
SO we woke up this morning feeling like we were hit by a truck. Harry actually went back to bed! The kids are rearing to go - but other than setting up breakfast I got nothing energy wise. I turned on the TV and CMT TV was on because I was watching old sappy movies before bed last night and of all people SNOOP DOGG was on the Country Music Channel with Willie Nelson rapping/singing you can see the video on You Tube here : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks3w859ujbU IT WAS SURREAL! I was like, "What the? I know I am tired and grouchy and not quite on the planet but when on Earth did Snoop Dogg becone a country singer?" I sat and watched the whole thing. Luckily for me, Taylor Swift came on afterwards and Patrick said, "Wow she sure is pretty - and she can sing too - Mommy, will I ever meet anyone that pretty someday?" Uh oh - no more MTV.....at 5 it is WAY too soon for that crap!
SO I am off to Church for an interview to see if I am a good fit for their need as a Social Justice Educator - I am very excited. After getting so burned at my last job I was not planning on returning to work any time soon - I was going to help out the SUnday School classes just to keep a little busy - but they said they needed this and it fits my degree so well....I am going to check it out. I did disclose everything that happened at Sacred Heart - I dont want ANY surprises and if I get told again that I am not Catholic enough or some such nonsense I will be heartbroken - better to disclose now. We will see -
SO I am dealing with Family, house cleaning, job interviews, lack of sleep and the heat - FUN day!!!
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