TechieWife: Blog

Mahalo

Thu, 14 Aug 2008 19:45:08 GMT

So this year's annual backyard camp out is a Luau theme. We will have a pot luck and the kids will have some crafts and games and fun in the sun (providing there is any sun) and then we will put on a little Luau for the parents with the kids. I have some songs that they will sing, I will teach the kids the hula and then they are making "poi fire balls" out of paper and glow in the dark paint to do a "fire dance". I found a song that I am teaching them too, thanks to Laurie Berkner (dont you just LOVE her?) actually titled Mahalo - here are the lyrics - they will be priceless with a little novice hula and then a fire dance before we make s'mores by the fire:

Mahalo to the urchin

Mahalo to the sea

Mahalo to the skies above,

Mahalo to you and me

Sing Mahalo, Mahalo, Mahalo for everything

Mahalo - that means thank you

Mahalo mahalo mahalo

Mahalo for the air I breathe.

Mahalo to my Dad and my Mom.

My sisters and my brothers and my good friends.

Mahalo for sharing my song!

Sing Mahalo, Mahalo, Mahalo for everything!

Mahalo that means thank you

Mahalo Mahalo Mahalo

- Lyrics by Laurie Berkner

Is that not too sweet? I actually have lucked out and have a neighbor who plays the guitar and has kids coming to the event so I have accompaniment too! This will be awesome! YAY!!! Gearing up - you know me, gotta have it planned.....

"Moooom, I TOLD you....."

Thu, 14 Aug 2008 15:50:51 GMT

This is my 3 year old's FAVORITE phrase lately. I have gone from hero to zero in some ways. Overnight it seems I have become a raving idiot. "Mom, I said I dont like mustard, remember? PATRICK likes mustard, I like mayonaise...sheesh" an exasperated litle girl plops down and sulks. Well....oops. Patrick on the other hand is fond of the shoulder shrug and grunt of "I dont know" when you ask him anything. "Patrick, do you like this?" you get the shrug....teenagers already? Uh uh...not having it.

Then they do something and it turns the WHOLE day around. I was up in the office getting the pillows off the floor from a fort that they made and RIley exclaims, "Mommy, I just love you SO much" and runs and give e a hug. A real hug. I wish there was a speial place to store that so that when she shouts that I am a moron for forgetting the mustard/mayo rule I could take it out, polish it off and remember that moment....wait I guess that is what the blog is for.

Today we are stuck inside doing laundry so I can go to the Orcas Islands this weekend for a kayaking trip with my pals. I need the break, though I wish it was happening with my hubby, not that I wont have a blast with the girlies, it is just Harry and I could use an escape too - him especially - he has been working VERY hard. Soon he will be in Australia and New Zealand without us and that is no fun for him....I would make the most of it but he reverts to his inner geek and works till he is exhausted and then hops on line for more computer stuff. Sight seeing? Nah. Not for him.

I am hoping I get enough laundry done that I can escape with the kids to a pool for a spell but I also have lessons this afternoon that I must prepare for (a mommy and me at my house in my pool - I think the water might be too hot though since it will be a scorcher - you can NEVER tell with the weather here - I swear it is bipolar and forgets its meds as it suits the Gods)....

On a happier note I weighed in at 225 today. WHOO HOO! 42 pounds down and counting!!!

AARP calling me?!?!?!?!

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 23:44:50 GMT

OK I know I know I KNOW you are sick of me bemoaning my old age crap - but in the days following my speeches to myself to get over it aolready today not only did I get a letter from AARP welcoming me to eligiability BUT I also got two emails from them asking me to join. Um....hello...still in my 30's people....let's not RUSH it for God sakes!

Someday I will laugh at it, but today, not so much.

On a happier note, yesterday at Kohl's I bought a pair of Levi jeans because I was shocked at the price and could not walk past. I figured if they did not fit me yet, they would soon, and the price was SO good - $50 marked to $20 - too good to walk away from. Levi's are not exactly forgiving, but I have ALWAYS wanted some and have not been able to wear any since college. When I started my journey I was a size 24 and Levi's do not come in Grand Dame sizes, if you catch my drift. I grabbed a size 18 petite (they had a 20 but I decided that was shooting too low) and I did not have time to try on. I thought if they did not fit me now, they would soon, some of my 18's at home do, some dont, hard to tell.

This morning I grabbed them and thought "let's see how long till I get to wear these big boy's"....and tried them on. I have worn them all day. HA! That and the tee shirt I wore all day was an L - ladies you KNOW what a huge deal that is - I was a 3XL when I started now I am a woman's size Large. Not XL, just Large. Thanks. AWESOME! I have not seen a size L since before I was preggers with Rileyanne after I lost 75 pounds! Whoo hoo!

Just a little something to keep me going - had to share the glory...

Getting To The Bottom Of It

Mon, 11 Aug 2008 16:13:32 GMT

Sometimes marriage is just hard. Families are hard - wonderful, magical, fun but also hard, dirty and just plain work. I had asked my husband to help out more and he became a Household Warrior going WAY above and beyond. Because he was doing so much he was exhausted and because he was exhausted he was cranky - because he was cranky I interpreted him as angry and because I too was exhausted I had no patience. You see, his expectation was, "I am a hero - you asked for help and I have not only helped but I went overboard! Please acknowledge me!" and my expectation was, "Would you please consistently help me with the dishes?" By doing SO much, he WAS a hero, but I perceived it as him thinking I was a slave driver - and so the vicious cycle of argument continued until we were both disclosing our "card hands" and had the ah ha moment of, "No I dont feel that way, do you?" if we had just been a little more forth coming in the beginning it would ALL have been avoided, but it is so easy to be a Monday Morning Quarterback, huh? Thank you, Harry for all your help, and for not leaving this morning till we were resolved and better - THAT is why we are US.

That said, my son now has a new bunk bed! I am anxiously looking for his bedding on line because Target discontinued it 2 years ago and I only bought one set then and painted the room to match (who knew Target stuff would be hard to find! That is why you buy it there!) - On a separate note - he is VERY into the Titanic lately as we are reading about it in his most recent chapter book. He spent the morning explaining to Riley that an Iceberg is a big mountain of ice that sits in the ocean but the REAL mountain is under the water and you dont see it but it can sink ships fast in the super cold water. My little geologist. Riley just wanted to know how she could put syrup on it and make a mountain sized snow cone - thats my gal.

Today I get to go and get my fill at my weight loss center so that the saline in my band is right. I am still not feeling ANY restriction and loosing ground I fear. I am ready to start back at the pool and checking with my old trainer about when I get to start with his team of regulars again. Then the REAL metamorphosis will begin. My 42 pounds is great and people are noticing so I want to stay on my roll. OK that was a bad choice of words.

Tomorrow we will go to the beach to swim if the sun ever pops out - here is a preview of our last trip as I promised my sister more pictures on this site - here you go...

That is me and my Rileyanne at the beach in Bellevue, WA.

Riley likes the water - she is like me, just try getting her out!

Patrick, however, makes BIG construction jobs out of the sand dunes...

He steadily works the ENTIRE time and has even mastered the art of making Sand Bridges which is something I have NEVER been able to do.

SO that is the word from my little family - peace out from the Pacific NW - please come back Sun.....

Feeling Threatened

Mon, 11 Aug 2008 07:53:53 GMT

So, for a while I have been bemoaning the past. Who I was, I guess, has come up a lot because I am starting to morph again. I am loosing weight, I am working on things, I had family here and had to deal with issues I had put aside a while ago, etc. ANYWAY, you put all that together with a 20 year reunion, and well, I started wondering where did all the time go? SO I have been talking about it, and if you ask my husband, I guess I have been doing so at nauseum. It is after midnight and we have had a big row.

Here is the thing, it is NOT that I liked my life before him more - in fact it is the opposite in many instances - the time with him is going by so fast it is like I am blinking and things are slipping by. I told him tonight that I wish I could savor the time, take more time, and really be present, but all he seemed to hear was that I was more happy before I met him - completely not true. I was at a loss. URGH why cant someone be nostalgic without causing the other person to feel threatened? I dont know. I do know that my life is better, happier and more incredible with Harry than it ever was before him, but I cant communicate that right now, no matter how hard I try.

The things is, I like being a Mom. I know that is very unhip - but I do. I just sometimes miss being myself. Having my own identity that does not involve being a cruise director, seemstress, cook, maid, problem solver, teacher, servant, entertainer and school nurse every minute of every day. My Mom recently said my kids are walking all over me, my kids are talking back more and more and my husband seems angry a lot - yeah I am on a ROLL y'all.

OK I am venting a bit, obviously, but I seem to have lost the ability to accurately communicate with anyone without upsetting them so the problem must be me. I am not afraid to say so, I just dont exactly know what to do. I obviously needed some time to think about my past and I am sorry that it hurt my husband, there was no one I wanted to see or contact except maybe myself - but there is no talking about it. I guess I must learn to just keep it to my own damn self - guess I just blew that publishing it here too...uh oh.

I cant be the only Mom to feel this way. But where do we go? Back to our crafts, cartoons, parks and playdates and put a smile on that face because damn it this was our choice and we would make it a million times over again and again - even if sometimes it is hard and no one we talk to gets us remotely well.

Getting Old, Dude

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 04:36:03 GMT

No I am not talking about McCain, I am actually talking about ME. I. Myself. I am ancient. I had a lovely dinner this evening with a very nice couple and their children who are the same ages (a little younger) than my cherubs, but the parents were younger. In discussing just HOW much younger, while telling them that THIS EVENING was my 20 year High School Reunion (NHHS Huskies y'all - Go Big Blue) I figured out that when I was hard core competing in swimming - you know by the 1984 Olympics in LA where I lived EVERYONE was swimming USS swimming and it was such a rush, the girl I was hosting was 3 years old. Lord Help Me.

Remember when you used to HATE being called "the Kid"? Or That Young Guy? Or the Newbie? Well, obviously those days are over for my husband and I. It was at that moment that I realized I was the old lady on the block. I was almost old enough to be this woman's Mom. Our kids are the same age - so I am almost old enough for....gulp...GRANDCHILDREN and my babies are still babies. See what happens when you have a carreer first and wait to have kids? It is a wierd bubble I live in in Seattle. Most of us are old broads with kids on the playground, but in the rest of the country I have to remind myself I am assumed to be a granny.

Anyway the dinner was lovely - could you please pass me my walker? I thinkI need to have my colostomy bag checked.

Casting Stones

Sat, 09 Aug 2008 03:50:13 GMT

So - I was so truly bummed out when John Edwards left the race. I know I know - we ALL want CHANGE. We want a nation where a black man or a woman can run and win and the time of rich white men just was not this race, but I LIKED him. Now, I am just pissed. Listen, I am not his wife, I am not his kid, and I am not his family - so whatever my opinion is it is irrelevant. That said, when the Clinton thing happened, I was adamant that it was between him, his wife, the girl and his family - if he had just not lied that would have been awesome. How cool would it have been if back then Bill Clinton got up and said, "It is between me, the girl, my wife and my kid. Enough comments - lets fix the country" that would have been awesome. If John had said, "This is between me, my wife, the woman and my family" instead of lying I would feel better - but several years ago he cast a LOT of stones Clinton's way calling him out for showing disrespect for his family, his office, the country, etc etc etc http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26095810?GT1=43001 BUT he did the SAME thing! Urgh - people suck. Dudes, keep it in your pants and if you MUST let the "little man" out, why lie? WHose business is it anyway? Just toughen up, buttercup, and state it like it is....IT IS BETWEEN YOU, YOUR FAMILY, and the POOR SAP WHO WAS UNFORTUNATE ENOUGH TO HAVE BEEN YOUR PLAYMATE....enough said.

Am I Supposed To Feel That?

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 01:29:36 GMT

So - as you are well aware - even if you check in sporadically - I have had Lap Band surgery. Again I feel the need to explain because I find myself doing this endlessly even with people who know and love me. Consider that I have altered the shape (all be it temporarily - it CAN be reversed even if I never intend to do so - ever - that surgery was not for wimps the first time around I doubt I could face it again) the shape of my stomach. Now instead of a large kidney shaped stomach organ, I have a small pouch on top, followed by a manipulated hour glass opening (where the pouch acts like a pony tail holder tieing my stomach together) and the rest of what my parents made for me is underneath. The good news is that I digest the food the same as always, so there is no need to freak out and deal wit problems facing many patients of gastric bypass, I can eat anything that can get through that opening. Which, unfortunately for me, is still EVERYTHING.

There is an ellusive topic other lap bandsters call "restriction" thus far I have not experienced it. I mean, if I eat WAY more than I should, yes I do feel that, because hello the pouch is only so big, so if I fill it I feel that - but thus far whatever I have asked to go through the hour glass has slipped by no problemo. Now, I am loosing at a fairly easy rate at about 2-3 pounds a week, which is comfortable and nice, so I am not stressing - I mean WHO WANTS TO GET SICK??? Not me. If I enjoyed that, as I have said in the past, I would have had a slew of other problems to deal with. However, I KNOW me. I can and do justify almost anything with the best of 'em. I am just fortunate I do not have any addictions (other than sour dough bread) that I am aware of. Bread and baked goods are my crack. I have never met a warm buttered ANYTHING I did not want to make mad pasisonate love to for hours and devour like a nymph on leave from her God's garden....but I digress....

On the band diet there should be no bread, rice, potato, tortilla, zip nada zilch nothing. These are the stuff that is supposed to back you up and block your hourglass. So far that is not the case with me and little by little I will and do find small ways to sabotage. Am I alone? I mean seriously? You order ANYTHING out or try to make anything at home with out instinctively making pasta, bread, rice, or tortillas with it. If you can and do do that regularly, PLEASE send me the recipes and I will be forever in your debt. I am still struggling with the not drinking while I eat! I am supposed to drink 20 minutes prior to eating and ionly an hour afterwards. Drinking pushes food through too fast 0 even for those of you not with a band. It makes you eat MORE...if you are like all the other Americans out there, STOP DRINKING WHILE YOU EAT and find ways to drink before and afterwards. Your body does need the 60-80 oz of fluid just not while you eat. Also some more tips that help me I will outline below - but make no mistake - as of now I am still making it on SMALL portions, concentrating on what I eat and NO sugar. That will not last I can promise you. If it WOULD last I would NOT have needed to invest in gastric surgery. So I will schedule yet another "fill" and go in for my usual lube 'n tube with the RN at the surgery center. They say it takes multiple "fills" to get it right, and then many people get "over filled" and have to go back for an "unfill" I am not looking forward to that, but it will be interesting to see what this thing called restriction is.

ANYWAY here is what I do:

I do not eat any more food than can fit on an old salad plate. That translates to about 1/2 a cup of food.

I eat with a baby spoon or fork - that keeps the amount I shovel in small and I count to 10 (silently of course) between bites. It takes me a good 20 minutes to eat anything this way. When out and about I use chop sticks. That makes the eating go slower too. (Most people have the next fork full at the ready so they are literally shovelling food in without stopping for air. This is a way to get a LOT more food in than you intend to)

I stop drinking 20 minutes before I eat and do not drink anything for at least an hour afterwards. If something is too spicy I am screwed because I cannot drink. I can take a small bite of yogurt to tame the burn if it is bad. Drinking while you eat washes food through your stomach faster than eating without drinking and so you eat MORE and are hungry faster after eating - not good.

I do not eat snacks that are not planned. Planned snacks include protein bars occasionally but mostly are nuts (I count them out - how anal I have become - but otherwise I could easily eat more than a few servings worth - mindless snacking can be a problem for me) or cottage cheese. I also like to have a can of V8 because veggies are not always pleasant for me to chew.

Speaking of chewing - with the band you gotta chew everything to excess. To swallow, it must be the consistency of baby food. Maybe that is why I have never been sick. I took them all seriously when they told me this. I chew forever, I NEVER swallow fast and when I notice that I am talking or reading or multitasking while I eat I STOP and just eat otherwise I will likely forget to chew. I chew every bite no less than 20 times - so I better like what is going in my mouth, it is gonna be there a while.

I still think I am not getting enough protein, but I am not really working out yet so it is ok. I must take a daily chewable multi vitamin and I make sure to drink at least one V8 daily (but that is ok they are like a treat for me, I love them - I know I am a FREAK!)

The things that are wierd are the things I thought would be a BIG deal that really are not. I miss carbonated drinks, who wouldnt but they are not on my mind all the time. I never think about it till I see someone pop a top or am in a diner place seeing people enjoying a yummy cola. Or beer. Or soda water - uh oh now it is on my mind - thanks a lot little blog! Seriously though, they have frozen sugar free popscicles that are soda flavors and those are allowed and fill the need. In a pinch I will share a SMALL cola flavored Icee with the kids and a few sips will do me. I am allowed other drinks though so no biggie. It was easier than I thought.

I thought burgers and stuff would be harder to miss, but you know, I have tried them at least while nothing gets stuck and I gotta tell you - burgers just do not taste good if you gotta chew them 20 times for every bite. If you are not inhaling it, it just is not much fun. Same with most junk food. Pizza, hot dogs, pretty much crappy food is pretty crappy if you gotta chew it to the point of liquification. Blech. No thanks.

You know what I have noticed? I never realized how much I LOVED shell fish. I mean it is becoming a religious experience. Squid (not shell fish, but I include it because I get all these things at the same places), shrimp, crab, lobster, all good things. Meats are tough because they must be moist and easy to swallow - over cooked and they are no go. I am scared to get "stuck" not that anything ever has. Enough people have complained about chicken to scare me off of it completely. I never really liked it much anyway, so no loss - but I thought I would REALLY miss red meat as it was always my favorite. Turns out, unless it is a REALLY good expensive cut and prepared med. rare, I am not going to eat it. Period.

SO now I am even more of a food snob than before - but I actually cost less to entertain and I eat only the best. Ha ha ha....now if only I could get this contraption working so it was not all my old Catholic guilt that kept me from turning back into a whale.....

I did notice something though - I went to the gym the other day and someone was staring at my incision marks. I dont think they are that bad, really, but I guess they look painful because they WERE painful, and unless you understand how hard it has been on my path and struggle it might look like I chose to harm myself. I didnot want to hurt myslef, and I do not like pain, but I do wear my scars with some pride. I wear them like a new bride wears a wedding ring - I know as long as I touch them, see them, remember them, and how hard they were to heal and feel and deal with, I will think twice before I jump into the drive through at DQ and get a large float or loaf of bread. You dont cheat while you look at your lovely wedding ring, do you? NO! You dont cheat while you remember scars of a life altering experience that made you different from the you you were before either. So stare away, but remember, I am not a freak and these are not my piercings.

Oh, and have I mentioned that all this on my mind and the kids are now phasing out of naps so that by 5:30 they are whining crying messes screaming at each other and I have no energy to help? Oh my house is SUCH fun - do come visit - but bring your A game food wise and PLEASE do NOT bring chocolate or I will hurt you. (and I say that with love;)

Now That Summer's Over

Sun, 03 Aug 2008 16:37:42 GMT

Last night I was wearing the following to a neighborhood BBQ: Long thick black jeans, thick socks, UGG boots (yes the wool kind), a thick turtle neck AND the warmest wool Christmas sweater I own. It was 54 degrees in the shade. In August. AUGUST. If it is this cold NOW in a few months I am seriously screwed. That was my wardrobe when it snowed!!! What the hell is going on? Even now it is 58 degrees in my house. IN MY HOUSE. My friend was stressed last week because her heater did not work - in August! That is all kinds of wrong. We had two weeks tops of lovely weather, now it is cold again. I dont mind a cold, snowy winter so long as I get my summer and spring - is that asking too much? I love my house, I love my new friends, I HATE this weather. Seriously. If the gray is bringing me down now, November is gonna so completely suck.

Good news though - while I wont make it to my 20th year reunion (where the hell did the time go??? NHHS class of '88 Huskies, I will miss you!) but I will be in LA in October - so maybe I will get some sun then. I am COUNTING on that actually. We will hang in Santa barbara a bit and then head down to the Biltmore (I went to a prom there so I am sorta excited not to show up in a '78 nova with only $10 in my pocket hoping not to need to call my Mom to come and get me - my how times change) and maybe head down to San Diego for a spell. The boy is getting a little old for Lego Land and he would SO dig it so that is kinda a must.

Anyway, if you see me and wanna give a shout out to Nannuk from the North as I will likely be sporting my best winter gear (fleece and all) give a holla....I will try to restrain myself from making egg nog in August, but the pumpkin pie day dreams I cannot hold in. I find myself looking at the trees already wondering when they will turn and fall - whoosh - that Summer flew by!

Mama Mia

Sat, 26 Jul 2008 14:58:52 GMT

Went with the gals to see the Chick Fick du jour of the moment - Mama Mia. You can watch the trailer on You tube at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzhxHsqQvsI

We started by getting dressed, I was the driver and showed them secret ways through Bellevue so that they could avoid traffic. Then we went to Daniels Broiler for appetizers and drinks (they have the tastiest Lemoncello's - YUMMMMM) and then to Lincoln Square for the show at 8:05. My lovely sister in law Nina had never been to an American Cinema and after a few drinks we were all ready for fun - we clapped and cheered and sangalong and made otherwise spectacles of ourselves - but the whole theatre was in on it. The cast was great and certainly beautiful to watch - tough Pierce Brosnan, while ever beautiful and certainly fun to see, could not carry the tunes and that was distracting. Still, it did not kill the show, no not at all, you found yourself sorta rooting for him like at a Karaoke bar.

If you have a wife - send her with her gals to the flick and let her have a moment in the SUN. Made me want to go RIGHT THEN and get tickets to go to Greece.

The cameo's by Abba were awesome too....Mama Mia, here I go again.....

When Family Visits

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 21:54:31 GMT

I am LOVING having my family here. It is so much fun and how I wish we were closer to each other more often, but the past two weeks with my big bro and his lovely wife and my DARLING nephew have been such fun. I think we are making a pact - every other year we see them there and in between they see us here. Works for me....

On the diet front though it is BRUTAL. Everyone keeps bringing chocolate, cakes, pies, ice cream, etc. into the house and I find it so hard to eat my diet crap when I could be having a slice of devil's food cake - I take only a small bite of cake and walk away, but still. Here are some great shots though of us all that I was surprised came out so well. My Dad even seemed to enjoy being here!

This is my Mon and her BFF my "Aunt" Alice who came from Florida to see the herd while as many of us were all together as could be. I wish my other brother and my sister and their families could have come too - though Lord only knows where we would have put them!

Me and my 'lil sis Marissa - isn't she BEAUTIFUL? She has an amazing heart too. Seriously she is the whole package, I was so glad she could come. My kids adored her, and well...duh you will see why -

Look at that LOVE! Aw.... Then there was sibling fun to be had -

Mark, Marissa and I - I guess I grew out not up - why is everyone in my family so TALL and I am so...well, gravitationally challenged???

Mark, me, my Dad and my kids. Pile on books! Wait that is not the slogan, is it?

Mark and his wife Nina and me of course - TWO WEEKS is going by WAY too fast!

Harry even has been a good sport about all these people in our house. I am a lucky gal I can tell you that - though I am exhausted....

Lube 'N Tube

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 19:11:27 GMT

So this new contraption in my bodyis a wild experience. If you dont have one, it is hard to explain - and I must do so endlessly it seems. I dont mind, I would be curious too, but it gets tiring because I am hardly an expert. I have the lap band, it works like an hour glass or a funnel, if food cant squeeze through the small opening it has made in my otherwise pretine and just as I was created stomach (nothing cut, stapled or otherwise altered - everything reversible and so on) then I will get sick. SO I must change my eating habits - eat smaller ammounts, slower, and healtier - nothing doughy that can clog the drain so to speak. (No rice, bread, potato, pasta, etc. which is a drag but sorta the point) AND every once in a while I need the Dr or RNP to access the port that has been sewn i under my skin on my belly to add saline to tghten the band and make the hole smaller. They call this "A Fill" like you are a car going in for an oil change or more gasoline.

ANyway I was TERRIFIED when I woke up today. I got fairly well dressed (that is a dead give away that I am feeling vulnerable by the way - If I am dressing up for a Dr appointment I am scared - it is like putting on armor before battle - I know I am a weirdo) but the actual accessing the port was NOTHING. I know I know I never believed anyone telling me that either. A needle in the belly has GOT to hurt like the DIckens but you know other than the anticipated stick it was NOTHING. Now she looked and noticed that my incision (you know the one I ASKED and drove up in rush hour for the Dr to look at a few weeks back? yeah that one) and said it was not healing right. I said, "Yes I know, but the Dr did not do anything on either appoint I set up" well she did, before I knew it she had a scalpel in her hand and she sliced me gently so it could drain. No pain killers needed, and it only hurt a little, it was WAY more scary than painful.

But I like my scale better than there's. According to thir scale I went from 257 (day of first visit in May) to 248 day of surgery to 234 today. Not nothing. But my scale is way more friendly. We have a naked morning ritual on weigh in days - naked and before coffee I have gone from 267 in APril when I was depressed and desperate to 228 today. I know no two scales are the same, and I weighed in there with clothes on and having already eatten, but still, 6 pounds difference (the wrong way) made me sad. HAD their scale said I weighed 6 pounds lighter than mine I would be doing the happy dance!!!

Either way I am headed in the right direction - yay me. First fill down - weren't no thang....in the words of my eloquent English professor at Cal State Northridge...

Traveling With Special Needs Kids?

Wed, 16 Jul 2008 20:01:46 GMT

I just found this site and think it is incredible - you can check it out yourself at www.safetytat.com but what I LOVE is that these are tattoos that you can write your cell phone number on - if you have a child with an allergy or a toddler you might become separated from, these are a GREAT idea! Choose your tattoo and go! AWESOME! What will they think of next? As a Mom I am always looking for stuff like this, though my kids know their home phone number now - if we are traveling I dont think they would remember my cell - Here is another tip though, when traveling, on your answering machine at home, do not say you are traveling but you CAN leave an alternate number like, "Hello, you've reached.... you may choose to also contact my cell at...." which does not say that you are not staying at your house, but if Disneyland is calling they have a chance to find you if your kids only know their home phone and are lost. Just a thought - anyway I thought I would share these - Enjoy and be safe... Julianne

Step 1 - Choose

Now Tats a Good Idea!
New ordering options from SafetyTat

If you’d like the same design for all your Safety Tattoos, choose from the Single Design selections. If you’d like a little variety, check out our new “Tat Packs”, which include two popular designs per order.

Color and contrast of SafetyTats will vary with skin tone. Click here to see a preview of an applied SafetyTat tattoo.

Single Design SafetyTats: One Design per Order

Tat Packs: Two Designs per Order

Check It

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 22:40:12 GMT

http://www.daratorres.com/gallery.php This is quite possibly the coolest picture I have ever seen. It is my HERO Dara Toprres with her 2 year old baby after dominating the 50 in Omaha to go to the Olympics at 41. I blogged about that day before and it is as impressive to me still - her official web page makes me smile - one of the topics she lists talks about middle aged mortals at the olympics - like she is a mere mortal - HA. Seriously I MUST get a poster for my walls like I was a teenager - she completely rocks! I cant wait to see her swim. I LOVE that only two of the kids on the team were even alive when she won her first gold medal - how awesome is that?

ANYWAY I have even better news - I GET TO SWIM AGAIN! Now, I am no Dara Torres, but I can cut a lane or two in my day. I am looking forward to swimming a bunch and by fall I hope to join the local Masters team so that by next Spring I can do some of the open water swims locally here. The water here is cold, but other than cold there is nothing to worry about. People here freak out about swimming in open water here, why? I dont get it, but then I have been blessed to swim with sharks in So. Cal, Tahiti, Mexico, and Hawaii (I wish I could say when I was in Australia I had the cahonies to get in the water BUT there was Great White Sharks out there and while I am a stud I am no death wish freak) so what do a few rabid Salmon have to freak me out about??? Ha ha ha. The water is a little more murky though....

STILL Dara Torres is my hero....check out her site and get on board cheering on the Mamma!

Off And Running

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 19:46:18 GMT

Dude - things are INSANE. I cant get to it all while still recovering from surgery. I would like to tak ethe Dr who told me I would be "Back to work in 3 days" and throttle him. What the? It is 4 weeks out now and I am still moving slower than usual. That is NOT ok with so many people on their way! I cannot believe my big brother his lovely wife and their darling baby will be here tomorrow! WHOO HOO! Words cannot describe how excited I am. I even went and got them stuff so that they will be comfy while they are here - you know little things, diapers so they dont have to worry, his favorite snack food, etc. I am SO excited. My Dad and little sister are coming on Thursday too! Jiminy Crickets we will have a FULL house! Likely to hit Mariners game this weekend and some sights plus the kids are in a little dance performance this Friday. Whew hold my breath and I might make it through - but before I can get to the sights and the fun I GOTTA CLEAN and that means I gotta stop needing to SIT down. My back hurts my tummy hurts and I am hungry so I am cranky - oh yeah I am a LOAD of fun! Come hang out with me - no really - you might make it outta here with your sanity, Lord knows I lost mine! Ha ha ha....

ANYWAY if you call and I am short with you, it is NOT you I am just under the gun!!!

You're Gonna Miss This

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 22:19:01 GMT

Dude - I heard this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vG9XfJxMY8A&feature=related on the radio today and started to cry. Maybe it is because my 20 year High School reunion is in the works this August. Yes that is right TWENTY YEARS! Whoa. Anyway, as I was driving to get the kids from Dance Camp I got to see a teeny tiny baby and for a second I wished we could have more. Well to be honest, I always wanted more. Harry, not so much. We had a deal - no putting ON the planet more than you take OFF the planet when you go, and we hit the jack pot a boy and a girl. We would adopt and still may, but as for making more, lets face it, I am pushing 40 soon (in a year and a half) and I do NOT want to be 60 with 20 somethings running around making HUGE mistakes. But for a second, I REALLY missed the baby days. Then I heard the song and it said what I was thinking - I missed everytghing. I missed my youth, I missed our old apartment in Marina del Rey, I missed our "BIG" move to Seattle, I missed the old "little" house, I missed the babies - but you know other than High school (well now that I think about it, I remember some day camp days I wish I had back too!) not ONE memory not one "I miss that" did not include Harry. That was nice. He is So my dude.

ANYWAY check out the sappy song. Be reflective a bit. Then go hug your babies - they will be teenagers before we know it!

Healing

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 05:58:48 GMT

So you know the Dr really must know what he is doing. My "fill" (I swear every time I say that it sounds like I am a car going in for an oil change) is in a week and a half. That is when I get to have a BIG needle put in my "Port" (borg part) and have a few cc's of saline injected so that the band around my stomach gets tighter. At first, after surgery and after the liquid diet, I was not only very careful about what I ate and how much I ate because I was scared but also because I just had no appetite. I wonder if the Codiene helped with that - it certainly did not "take away" the pain just made me completely appathetic towards the pain (and everything else what a horrible feeling). ANYWAY now that I am mostly healing except for a few spots that are still not completely closed yet, I obviously am getting my appetite back - and in spades. My "head hunger" is a nasty mother you know what-er. I do not need these things but I find myself "wanting" things - things I di dnot even LIKE because I cannot have them. That is my deal - you want to make sure I will do something? Go ahead and tell me I cant. I will rise to that challenge it is like an achilles heal. I probably should not have disclosed that, but hey, if you know me at all it is hardly a secret. Somewhere my husband is laughing his ass off - stop that it is not nice to laugh so hard soda comes out your nose sweetie - :)

ANYWAY the head hunger made me want the following today (none of which I had, I just wanted till I moved on to wanting something else) A Big Mac, hot fudge sundae, milk shake, french fries, chili dog, pizza, pasta, potato, BREAD, more bread, did I mention bread (I really wanted some bread). OK what I had instead, my alloted oatmeal for breakfast, all my fluids, a chicken wrap for lunch, some gazpacho soup and hummous with veggies for dinner and for a snack one handful of peanuts, That is it. ALL within limits. Not a lot of glamour or fun, but hey that was sorta the point, right?

So head hunger is a bitch and I will name her Evangeline. I HATE that bitch. So when she shows up I am showing her ass the door, baby. So far I am down from 267 (start weight in April) to 228 (now). SO Evangeline, I am winning honey, and you know what? I like winning. My husband likes that I am starting to "care" about matching my unmentionables again and my clothes are not exactly tents anymore. I like that I do not touch the sides in the movie theatre seats and that pretty soon my double chin will be a thing of the past but you know what I like the best? If I do this right, sweetie pie, This weight that I am right now? Right here? This is the biggest I will ever be ever again. I will never weigh more than I do right now. I will win that at least - I may not make goal, I hope to and will try every day to get there - but at least I CAN achieve that. I never have to get any bigger. So take your soft talking suggestions of fatty death high caloric thrill ride cheap food and go bug someone else - I am not answering the door anymore!

CRAZY!!!

Sun, 13 Jul 2008 14:56:12 GMT

So we have had an insane weekend. There are weekends when you got nothin' planned, and then there are weekends like this one, where you have family coming in and you must clean the house, there are a million birthday parties and you are expected at all of them, your Mom has a guest coming to town who is a long lost AUnt (Hi Aunt Alice) and you need to go see her which sounds like a blast if there was not so much to do too AND you have a job interview at the Church after Mass this morning. Whew! Yesterday we had two parties back to back which was pretty hard on the kids. I was asked at both parties to do face painting and I gotta say it was fun, I made a little poster for the parties so that the kids could choose what they wanted if they got stuck not knowing and off we went. Even the adults were asking for Tattoos. It was fun. Even though I was an invited guest, I never got up from the chair because my line was never empty till I finally said it was time to stop - each party I painted for 3 hours straight - it was creative and fun but took more out of me than I anticipated. Even though my kids were guests at the party people assumed I was hired to be "Entertainment" which is funny to me. I had not painted faces for years and even then it was a fledging effort - but people liked my stuff so that was fun.

SO we woke up this morning feeling like we were hit by a truck. Harry actually went back to bed! The kids are rearing to go - but other than setting up breakfast I got nothing energy wise. I turned on the TV and CMT TV was on because I was watching old sappy movies before bed last night and of all people SNOOP DOGG was on the Country Music Channel with Willie Nelson rapping/singing you can see the video on You Tube here : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks3w859ujbU IT WAS SURREAL! I was like, "What the? I know I am tired and grouchy and not quite on the planet but when on Earth did Snoop Dogg becone a country singer?" I sat and watched the whole thing. Luckily for me, Taylor Swift came on afterwards and Patrick said, "Wow she sure is pretty - and she can sing too - Mommy, will I ever meet anyone that pretty someday?" Uh oh - no more MTV.....at 5 it is WAY too soon for that crap!

SO I am off to Church for an interview to see if I am a good fit for their need as a Social Justice Educator - I am very excited. After getting so burned at my last job I was not planning on returning to work any time soon - I was going to help out the SUnday School classes just to keep a little busy - but they said they needed this and it fits my degree so well....I am going to check it out. I did disclose everything that happened at Sacred Heart - I dont want ANY surprises and if I get told again that I am not Catholic enough or some such nonsense I will be heartbroken - better to disclose now. We will see -

SO I am dealing with Family, house cleaning, job interviews, lack of sleep and the heat - FUN day!!!

Adieu

Sat, 12 Jul 2008 16:58:44 GMT

Did you see that the former White House press secretary Tony Snow died today at the age of 53? I knew he had cancer, but I do not know why I thought he was improving. It is wierd that he was only 15 years older than I was but he SEEMED So much older - still when people your age start dying it makes you stop for a second. I truly distested and argue his politics, but I am sad he lost his fight - he certainly made his lies more interesting at any rate.....may he be at peace.

Growing Old

Sat, 12 Jul 2008 14:31:55 GMT

So my puppy is NO puppy any more. I have blogged on it before, but he is a party pomeranian, tuxedo black and white, named D'Artagnon (I call him D'Art) who is 16 years old. He has out lived cancer, has a metal plate and pins in his back leg when he fell and broke it several years ago and is going blind. He is now deaf and slow and MUST wear a diaper. He is particularly upset about the last one - the diaper. It is a special doggy one, but it is just indignant if you ask him, which no one really has, because it is not up to him. He cannot help himself and my house smells of his "markings" because I should have done the diaper LONG ago and knew it but just could not bring myself to do it to him.

Well, now when he is inside he is swaddled. That is that. He HATES it I mean LOATHES it. He looks at me so sad and I know I am attributing human feelings to him, but he seems so expressive to me, are you kidding? If you saw his face and his eyes your heart would break too, but what can I do? Lock him in the garage? That seems SO much worse as the weather up here can be too extreeme for him, plus there are mice out there he would go insane and who would love him? No no no the diaper stays just STOP looking at me like that!

We take him outside to go potty like normal but I have yet to remove the diaper that it has not been used. Anyway, when he goes outside I take the diaper off, obviously, and last night the little guy hid from me. Now it was night time and he is black and I live out in the woods on a full acre lot. There are no lights out here in the land of 70 foot trees so he could hide pretty good. I was scared! We have had some attacks from local wild life on the small dogs and cats in the 'hood, but they usually happen at sunrise and sunset, but he was gone so long I thought maybe he was gone gone, you know? I got the flash light and started walking the property calling him - which does not help because he is deaf - but it made me feel proactive. I saw nothing. My husband came out to help. Just as we were giving up, there he was at the back door like nothing was wrong and what were we doing outside? Was it a potty party? Did we pee on a tree too? Does he have to start marking all over to un do whatever and whereve we peed too? (Again, if you SAW his face you would have gotten all that loud and clear too!

Then came time to put the diaper back on him. He cowers, shakes, begs, but I cant help it. The pee is disgusting, it is everywhere, and I cant keep up with it any longer. When the kids could not control it they wore diapers too! But instead of sleeping in his usual spots, now he is sulking under the table next to the couch as far away from the family as possible. He is a pack animal - this is not normal. I HATE that he is so sad - but what can I do? He is so old, my only job is to LOVE him up, but he wont even let me pet him, he just shakes and hides. It sucks to be an aging dog I guess - my puppy is growing old and there is not much I can do to help him. SO sad.

Still Swollen

Fri, 11 Jul 2008 17:03:32 GMT

So I hit the scale today and I am in the 220's!!!! HOORAY! Yet nothing fits yet - I am in the same size I was pre surgery and still not wearing pants - just dresses because my tummy is still swollen. I guess after a surgery that is to be expected but it sure would be nice to show a little - I can see it only in my face which is nice so not really complaining just moderately whinning......

That said the kids are absolutely DOINE with Mommy being not quite right. They are fighting, have reached the end of the "teamwork" model we set up and are now starting to revolt! SO we are off to a park with friends to play and "fun" their bad mood out of them! I think they are picking up on my stress about all my family coming to my house next week which cant be a good thing for them either.....will work on that.

BEAUTIFUL day in Seattle today BTW. Off to enjoy it NOW - bye

Jane Austin Book Club

Thu, 10 Jul 2008 16:51:09 GMT

Last night I saw the movie "Becoming Jane". It was lovely - I had my tea and had a chick flick night. The kids were asleep - Harry was working - I had "ME" time. Anyway, I had no idea it was such a sad story. I am glad she "lived by her pen" which was relatively unheard of in her time, but so sad that she lost Mr. Lafoy. It of course made me think of love's lost, people I will never see again, etc. but you know, I consider myself SO lucky which is not a great exciting story but it is my happy ending I know. So many people rant and complain and bemoan their marriages - If only HE would change, IF only SHE would do this or that - if only I had done this or that differently - etc etc etc. It became a night of self examination. I am happy to say that not only am I an extremily fortunate woman to be married to Harry who is a great husband and an amazing father, but I have been fortunate to surround myself with friends here in the forst that are equally thankful for their situation - I think that is sorta important. Not that I dont love and listen to friends who need to "vent" about their marriages, we ALL need that from time to time, but most of the people in my immediate circle take marriage and family as seriously as I do - which is to say PARAMOUNT. (again, not that people who have needed to divorce did not consider family paramount - I understand that there are VERY real reasons for divorce and seperation - I am talking about the mid life crisis "I am just not HAPPY" people - that gets to me in many ways - being the child of twoce divorced, "I am just not happy" parents).....WOW this has gotten off the rail fast.

BACK to JANE - I was so sad for her. She lived her life not only by her pen but through it. I am re-reading her material now with new luster, searching for the words her heart longed for with a new found sadness and a new thankfulness that I have been so fortunate to have co-created this family that is mine, Harry's, "OURS". I know he gets all red when I gush about it, but I think far too many people leave it unsaid, "THANK YOU for our life, dear husband - thank you for your support, your love, our kids, our home, your sacrifices, my sacrifices, our friendship and our laughter" OK mushy stuff over - Harry try to stop turning purple, people will stare.....

A Good Day

Wed, 09 Jul 2008 07:05:50 GMT

Today was INCREDIBLE. We played at Inglewood Beach in Bellevue ALL day. The kids swam and played and just frolicked with their friends. It was how I remembered days at the beach from when I was a kid only without the waves. There was even an Eagle that swooped down from time to time catching fish out on the water! I mean it was breathtaking! Then later I went to see this band http://www.edshawentertainment.com/artists3/afrodisiacs/index.htm at the Kirkland waterfront with my good friend Laura and we danced the night away without the kids. It was a blast! We saw the sun go down over the water and then spent the evening walking around Kirkland talking and window shoping like a couple of 20 somethings without a care in the world. We talked about the kids, the husbands, the schools, life, etc. It was just one of those days. I dont want it to end, but alas I am tired and my belly hurts from too much activity.....till tommorrow....I have pictures but I cant download so you will have to wait for Harry and he is SWAMPED! Poor guy I was out having fun and he was home working, what a Trojan! He is some kind of guy, that man of mine. I hope he knows how much I appreciate these nights off, he gets a gold star.

Sheer Volume

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 17:51:49 GMT

You know - I was NEVER the gal who sat in the closet eating a tub of ice cream alone. I am A. too social and B. never liked Ice Cream enough. Ha ha ha. I used to think, "I dont think I eat that much, why am I this big?" and I had PLENTY of things to blame it on. Things like my PCOS which makes me insullin resisitant. It is true that many many women with PCOS struggle with weight so it was an easy target. It of course contributed but was not the absolute factor - no no no. I WAS. Here is how I KNOW now.

Last night I was allowed "real" food. We had to keep the kids out of the house because the carpets were just shampooed (yes again - we do this several times a year because we live in the woods and the carpets get filthy but also to help with Rileyanne's asthma). ANYWAY we went to a Thai place and ordered the kids some garlic beans (their favorite believe it or not) and I ordered crab phad thai figuring we would share. My dish came and it was DIVINE but it handily fed all three of us, was a lovely side dish for Harry's Panang Curry and I have seriously at least two meals worth in the fridge for later. Can you believe that? In the past I easily would have eaten that entire dish alone, plus an appetizer to share and maybe a dessert later! I had no idea what I was consuming or how much! I sat and politely, slowly, consciously, chewed and enjoyed the meal. Before I knew it, my 20 minutes had passed and the kids and I had pretty much picked the crab and egg (Riley liked the crab - good girl, Patrick the egg, I liked both) and some noodles out. Plus some beans. It was lovely. Afterwards, again, very unlike me, I wanted to WALK.

This is odd because, well, when I think about what I used to polish off, I would sit there in a food coma just trying to grip what my body was processing. Now, I am ready to MOVE after a meal to help it get through. I need the stretch and I want to walk. It is a new feeling. So Patrick and I took a walk. This is a lovely new thing and special time for the kids and I to share.

SO for all my complaining, already I am seeing benefits from this surgery. I am down 37 pounds, I am off my diabetic medication Metformin completely, and I am ready to MOVE. As soon as I get the go ahead I cannot wait to hit the pool, get in some sort of shape and start on the Masters swim team again. My goal? Well, I want to find a relay team for next years triathalons so I can do the swimming leg. Who is sitting on their ass now????

Another fun side note - if you are not eating much, you eat GOOD. Here is the deal - with the band you gotta chew your food like 40 times before your swallow. You better make sure you like the taste of that stuff because that is a LONG time in your mouth, You really get all the flavor out of whatever you put inside it. No more inhale and go for me. I will yak, and I am completely adverse to yaking. Not only this, but at a place where we used to spend like $60 easy for a family of 4 to eat (which is still pretty reasonable) we only spent $45 last night. that is a nice side note - buy better but buy less.

Now trying to explain to the waiter that I did not want water was tough, he just did not get it. I cannot drink during a meal - it is not good for the band. I drink up to 20 minutes before eating and then wait an hour after eating. It takes getting used to and explaining to my Mother why I cannot drink water while I eat is an endless battle but that is the way we "Bandsters" do it and you know what? I have thus far lost weight so I am playing along. :)

Diapers

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 06:49:07 GMT

I just finished potty training Rileyanne. No diapers, not even pull ups at bed time! She is such a BIG girl! She beat Patrick who I thought was doing pretty good at 3 1/2 to be out completely by almost 6 months! Girls rock.

But now, my poor old puppy D'Artagnon, whom we have always called D'Art (mostly because he is a little black streak of a black party pomeranian running this way and that - even still) at the YOUNG age of 16 is finally in diapers. I broke down and got him some puppy male cloth diapers and lined them with DEPENDS (beause to do so is literally HALF the price of the dog brand for the same result) and so, one out of diapers one in. You win some you loose some.

Poor guy though, he looks at me like, "What is this crap?" but I have yet to wake up and it is dry. He has a hard time walking and it is loose enough, I think he just does not like the feel of it, who could blame him. His dignity, his hearing (he did not even stir on the 4th with fireworks in the front yard! Usually he barks so hard all 4 legs come off the ground!) and his arthritis are acting up. BUT I remain steadfast - my only job is to love him up and help him out. I know he does not think that is what I am doing with the diaper but it is. I just cant keep cleaning the carpets anymore. Not only expensive, but the house just WREAKS! I am using vinegar which gets the smell, but leaves the house smelling like a gigantic salad for about a week. But by the time the salad toss smell fades, he has peed again all over so it is a vicious cycle. SO it was diaper time or off to the garage which gets way too cold in the winter - who am I kidding, it STILL feels like winter here at 45 degree at night in JULY!

So, D'Art, this pad's for you, boy. Poor guy.

Did You See It???

Sun, 06 Jul 2008 14:36:57 GMT

Last night an amazing thing happened in Omaha at the Olympic Trials for the US Olympic Swim Team. Dara Torres, at the age of 41 (your read that right, let me spell it out FORTY ONE) not only MADE HER FIFTH Olympic team but she also made an American Record in the 50 meter freestyle. She did this with her 2 year old daughter watching in the stands! She is hands down my freaking hero! She is AMAZING! I was screaming and jumping and hollering so loudly my son got out of bed and came downstairs to see what was the matter. When he got here I had tears in my eyes I was so happy for her (and all us old broads). Unbelievable!

Look, only 2 other "kids" on the team were even ALIVE when she competed in her first games in 1984 at the age of 17, did you know that? She has won several Gold medals, she has risin above dopping charges that ruin most carreers by stepping up and subjecting herself to any testing they have and she HAS A KID! She took a 7 year "retirement" only to come back and just kick ass. I loved her style, her grace, her speed. The 50 meter is a race horse event, it is for the speed demons, if yo are older than say 25 you cant usually cut it. Muscles just cant keep up with the synapses of the young ones, but some hoe she has conditioned her body and done not only the impossible to win but the incredible to beat the record! It was a scream worthy moment!

I want tee shirts that save, "Dara Torres, One Fast Mamma!" or "Mamma in the Fast Lane" or something. I want her picture on my wall like a teenager. AMAZING!!!!

Small Non-Surgical Victories

Sat, 05 Jul 2008 20:32:37 GMT

My new on line support group calls these NSV (non surgical victories) and yesterday and today I have had a few! With all my moaning and groaning I thought I would share some. Sorry the pictures are not yet downloaded from the camera (HARRY!) but I will get some here soon....

We went to a 4th party yesterday and while we were invited to a few I chose to stay close to home in case I was just not up to it. I was in charge of desert and baked a huge sheet cake and 32 cup cakes and came home with NOTHING LEFT. On top of that I made my favorites and everyone enjoyed them but I was not even tempted. That was a nice feeling. NSV #1.

While at the BBQ I should have packed some food but was determined not to make a scene and figured since I walked there if there truly was nothing there for me I could walk home, but I stuck to the dip try (I am still on mushy food only - think anything blended like baby food - soft enough to mash with a fork) but I was hopeful for some potato salad. It was yummy but still too hard so I stuck to a spoonful of guacamole and hummous. It was yummy and I ate with everyone without having to scream I had my own "SPECIAL" diet food, so that was nice. NSV#2.

While everyone ate dessert, I had waited a full hour after eating and had a lovely little glass of REAL lemonade. Delish. Nothing major and I felt like I got a treat. NSV #3.

I came home early and the kids stayed out with Dad watching fireworks. Then today we went to Home Depot and such and while out decided to eat. I was actually a little worried - where the heck do I go? No bread, no rice, no pasta and it has to be soft enough to mash with a fork....MEXICAN! At least I could have some beans was my thought.

I ordered a crab enchilada a verde and it was DIVINE. I ate it "autopsy" style which I know sounds vile but was not so bad it just means I cut it open and only ate the insides not the tortilla. I ate some guac with it and salsa and beans. Only 3 (I counted) VERY small forkfulls of rice that were with other stuff and chewed to oblivion too. I had cut my plate in half so I knew what half of the order was and only ate half of that with my crabs stuff and had tons to bring home. I could have eaten more but thought better of it, I placed my forkl DOWN between bites and as soon as I got the first hiccup (which is the sign that your pouch is distended) I stopped. NSV # 4.

Now normally I would have finished that whole plate and instead of ordering one enchilada on a special order I would have gotten a full order of two of them and eaten the whole thing. I would have felt like sitting there for a while and I would have drank several glasses of something with the meal. With the band you drink up to 20 minutes before you eat and not again for an hour afterwards. After I ate my small but great lunch I was ready to walk around and shop - it was a great feeling to be nourished and not FULL. NSV # 5.

We went shopping, and after we got our errands done I ran into Starbucks to use the potty. The coffee smelled so good and I wanted a Honey Latte pretty bad as it had started to rain and we were returning home for nap time qand I just wanted to cozy up - but it had not been an hour, I did not need the caffeine and my body really was "full" in the new banded sense so I enjoyed the aroma and walked out. NSV#6 (seriously the old me would have finished all the food AND had the coffee and probably a baked good - gee I wonder why I weigh 100 pounds over weight??)

SO there you go - all that moaning and I am now sitting on 6 NSV's in a two day span, hot shit, huh? Also when I started I was 267 at weigh in with the Dr. Yesterday at weigh in at home I was 235. That is 30 pounds from April to now. Hot shit is right baby. 100 pounds from now? Are you kidding me? That was what I was in HIGH SCHOOL! Bring it ON! And then take my cute little patooty back to Hawaii, ok? I would LOVE to go surfing in a bikini like I did in High School too!!! (I bet Harry would like that as well!)

The Kind Of Woman

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 18:11:32 GMT

Lightning - Thunder - now hail the size of golf balls - um we are staying home but it is so dang cool! Cleaning and picking up - it is time to clean house! Literally!

So what am I listening to? Well I love the new song (I think it is new - it is new to me) by Jewel called Stronger Woman - there is a line in it where she says something like, "From now on I am gonna be the kinda woman I want my daughter to be"......I like that. If you want to check it out - here you go.

God Is Bowling

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 14:02:15 GMT

Last night we had one of those electric light storms that I used to read about before moving to the Pac NW. The kind where you teah your kids to start to count once they see the streak of light because the thunder clap is so thunderously loud it sounds like it is in their bedroom. The light creasing the sky and shooting between our 70 foot + trees was spectacular! It interrupted your dreams with crazy throbs of urgency usually reserved for emergencies, but non ever really arose. Then came the rain, soft at first, then sheets, then hard buckets. That was whe you know you were in for more of "the SHOW" and the sky lights this morning have certainly not disappointed.

I am thinking this is a cleansing rain. I will look at it that way anyway. I went to the Dr. yesterday to look at my incision sites and all is well. He even said I could move on to soft foods! WOW! Now I can eat something not just drink liquids as I have the past few weeks. Last night I had 1/4 cup of cottage cheese for dinner and it was the best cottage cheese I have ever tasted in my life. I was good, I used a very small spoon and made it last but I could have inhaled it. I also had a small piece of watermelon but I felt that so I stopped there.

I slept like I have never slept. Racing thoughts, thanks to the rain, her friend thunder and thunder's sister Lightning. The cat oddly seems so relaxed through the storm, as does the dog. No freaking out, just a sorta, "Dude, do you believe this?" and more than once I have caught them both looking out the window with nary a stir. I take that as the cleanse, while needed is a good thing.

SO as I look at my "Poetic Soul" and its nw day, my new day of food - actual food - and walking/exercise, the world around me is clean and I am starting fresh as well. God's bowling game (that is what we used to call lightning and thunder when I was a kid) is doing me some serious good, and I am sitting here watching the "Show" unfurl while I drink my tea and await my family to wake from their wild thunderous dreams. I dont remember all of mine but I do know it included a dragon - which I attribute to the lightning storm completely. I also know whatever I was doing in it I woke up more tired than I went to sleep - it was an action dream. SO we will see how the kids are doing today....